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Don Elium Psychotherapy

  • Blog
  • Sessions
    • Individual Sessions
    • Couple Sessions
    • Steps to Start Couple Therapy Video
    • Grief Recovery Sessions
    • EMDR Sessions
  • Articles/Don
  • Indiv-Study
    • Listening to Shame
    • There Is Hope In Resentment
    • Atomic Habits
    • Power of Vulnerablity
    • Boundaries
    • Grief/Trauma Recovery Letter Process
    • Forgiveness and anger
    • When Things Fall Apart
    • Stop Dumb Arguments, before you begin them
    • Cognative Dissonance
    • Spoon theory — for atypical energy levels
    • How Grief Rewires Your Brain
    • Compassion: It is an human instinct
    • Mistakes Were Made, But Not By Me (Cognitive Dissonance)
    • BREATHING and anxiety reduction
    • 8 c's
    • Body Based Release
    • When You Feel Shut Down, The Impact
    • Internal Family Systems
    • State Specific Memory
    • 13 Strategies For Overcoming Shame
    • 13 Self-Compassion Phrases
    • Cognitive Dissonance
    • Attention Deficit Disorder
    • The Voices In My Head
    • Difference between Panic Attack and Heart Attack
    • Attachment Injury Trauma Recovery
    • Divorce Recovery
    • Dating and Finding A Partner
    • Meditation & Brain
    • Subconscious Cue Word Procedure
    • Practicing Compassion
    • Psychiatrist Referrals
    • Emotionally Focused Therapy For Couples
    • ADHD Explanation
    • What happens when we sleep
    • Grief rewires after losing someone
    • Signs of Autism in Adults
    • ASD - Autism Spectrum Disorder
  • Rel-Study
    • Gottman Couple Counseling
    • Personal Plan For Change In Your Relationship
    • 3 Reasons Couple Come to Counseling
    • Emotional and Need Detector
    • Feelings/Needs and Requests
    • Complaint Formula
    • Make Better Bids for Connection
    • Four Horsemen
    • The Four Moves Of Being Heard
    • Couples On The Brink: Leaning Out or In?
    • Emotional Flooding
    • The Emotional Intensity Meter
    • Stonewalling
    • Accepting Influence
    • Window of Tolerance
    • Logical Fallacy Detector
    • Logical Fallacy Analysis
    • The PAUSE sooner
    • Turning Away Example
    • Repair After An Argument
    • How To Complain Without Hurting Your Partner
    • Flexible and Core Needs in Relationship
    • UNSOLVEABLE PROBLEMS: Dreams Within The Conflict
    • How Enduring Vulverablities Are Affecting Your Marriage
    • Perpetual Problems and Solvable Problems
    • Sound House Of Relationship
    • TIMEOUTS for Relationships
    • NVC - Non Violent Communication
    • The CIRCLEBACK
    • Vulnerable and Protective Emotions
    • Gottman Love Lab
    • Online Relationship Checkup
    • WE ARE JUST DIFFERENT PEOPLE!? WHAT CAN I DO!???
    • The Problem With Sincere Transformation
    • Two Kinds of Domestic Violence
    • Self Soothing
    • Shared Meaning
    • State of the Union Check In
    • Couple Development Scale on Differentiation Spectrum
    • Differentiation in Relationships
    • Anger is hot. Contempt is cold.
    • Compassionate Agreements vs. Rules
    • Stop Trying to Fix Your Partner's Feelings
    • Sustained Behavior Change
    • The Five Love Languages
    • How To STOP A FIGHT
    • 3 Common Problems in ALL Relationshpips
    • Second Order Change
    • Five Languages of Apology
    • Gottman 7 Principles Book Summary
    • Hanging Onto To Yourself, and Being Close
    • How To Get The Most Out Of Couples Therapy
    • Why Relationships Are So Hard
    • How You Know You Are In The Green
    • Gottman Couples Counseling Study
    • Emotional Bank Account
    • Verbally Abusiveness in Relationships
    • Gottman Charts
    • Eroticism & Self-Care Plan
    • Are You a Sex Addict? 10 Questions to Ask Yourself
    • Sexual Closeness
    • NEED BASED Conversations - NVC
    • Premarital and Dating
    • 52 questions before moving in
    • Marital Separation
    • Understanding Infidelity & Recovery
    • Infidelity Recovery
    • Love Maps
    • Assess
  • About
  • Policy
  • Sign In My Account
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Blog

EMOTIONAL RELIABILITY

November 8, 2024 Don Elium

Emotional reliability refers to the consistency and dependability with which a person responds to others' emotional needs, particularly in relationships. An emotionally reliable person provides a stable and predictable presence, especially during stress, conflict, or vulnerability. This reliability helps build trust, as others know they can count on this person to handle emotional situations with care, empathy, and sensitivity.

Key Characteristics of Emotional Reliability:

  1. Consistency: They respond stably regardless of the situation.

  2. Empathy: They genuinely understand and validate others' emotions.

  3. Predictability: Their reactions are calm and measured, avoiding dramatic mood swings.

  4. Availability: They are emotionally present when needed, offering support.

  5. Non-judgmental: They listen without criticizing or dismissing others' feelings.

Examples of Emotional Reliability:

  1. In a friendship:

    • Imagine a friend who always listens attentively when you need to vent after a difficult day. They offer support without distraction, make you feel heard, and check on you afterward to see how you’re doing. This friend is emotionally reliable because you can trust that they will consistently be there when you need emotional support.

  2. In a romantic relationship:

    • A partner who stays calm and understanding during a disagreement, rather than becoming defensive or dismissive, shows emotional reliability. They prioritize finding a resolution and maintaining emotional connection, even in conflict.

  3. In a parent-child relationship:

    • A parent who consistently provides a safe space for their child to express their feelings without fear of being reprimanded is approachable and nurturing. Whether the child is angry, sad, or happy, the parent offers guidance or comfort.

  4. At work:

    • A manager who maintains an open-door policy listens to employees' concerns without jumping to conclusions or reacting with frustration. Employees know they can approach the manager with problems, confident they will be met with understanding and support.

In all these examples, emotional reliability builds trust and fosters healthier relationships, as people feel secure in knowing their emotions will be met with care and respect.

NOTE: Practicing the skills to increase emotional reliability is challenging. In other words, this is not easy but doable in small, compassionate steps.

← The Difference Between Schizophrenic-related Voices and the "Inner Voices" of Most PeopleYour Emotional Window of Tolerance: How to know when the intensity is too much! →
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